Something I’ve been reflecting on is the arguments I get into with my wife. I wrote previously that sin is our problem. However, I also want to add something that must not be ignored.
Fighting with your spouse may be the very thing God uses to edify and change you into a better man or woman. As Christians, if we believe God uses all things together for our good, then that includes our fights with our spouses. That includes our disagreements.
What this means is that we need to look at our fights as information gathering. In a fight, there is much that is demonstrated. Our sin, where we disagree, what we each think and believe.
God will use our disagreements to help us mature. We must use them for that end. This is why I thank God for my fights with my wife. I don’t thank God for the sin in those fights, but that sin is revealed and disunity in particular areas is brought to light. As a husband, these fights reveal to me where I must think through if I am wrong or right regardless of how I feel. If we do disagree then I need to lead us through the necessary steps in either coming to an agreement or in choosing to walk together in a way that doesn’t undermine one-another.
Often in fights both parties need to seek forgiveness for their sins, but that’s not all. Both also need to listen and reflect, using these opportunities to grow and mature and see if there is truth to what is being portrayed, even if we don’t like how it’s being portrayed.