Why My Wife and I Don’t get along

It’s true. We don’t get along. Well, at least sometimes. Usually when one of us is tired, or hungry, or cranky, or as my wife says, hangry. Except this isn’t really entirely true.

You see, when I’m tired or hungry around others, I’m quicker to watch my tongue and check my heart. I’m a little more ready to squash how I feel and do what is right. But, when it’s just my wife and I, I don’t pay as close attention to my words, and I don’t check my heart as quick. I’ll let my feelings well up more and I’m quicker to lash out or lash back.

There’s a word for this, it’s called sin. The truth is our sinful nature is what causes us to not get along. I want what I want, and she wants what she wants. Or, I want what she has, and she wants what I have. It’s a mess.

I think James sum’s it up quit nicely:

James 4:1-3

[1] What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? [2] You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. [3] You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. (ESV)

The only way we deal with this is by learning to love one another. Which basically means thinking about the others need over and above our own. It means wanting to spend every ounce of your strength diligently seeking to obey the Lord, and that often means loving your spouse in such a way that you expend yourself for them. As you do it, you find that you have a never ending supply, because God has given you a well, not a tank.

Praise be to God that we have seen it modeled for us in Jesus Christ. So be filled with the Spirit, be constant in prayer, and continue meditating upon God’s word.


About TruthN

Husband. Father of one. Writer of fiction. Massage Therapist. Video Game, Comic Book, Fiction, and Non-Fiction enjoy'r. Reader of Theology. You may find him reading the Bible. View all posts by TruthN

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